Four Year Olds Don’t Lie

Isabelle’s preschool had an adorable Mother’s Day brunch for us yesterday. The kids sang us songs, made and served us lunch, and presented us with presents. It was super cute. Each child also made a placemat for their mom with questions on it that they had answered…

 

What I Really Want For Mother’s Day

1. I would like eight hours of deep, continuous sleep. I want eight hours where I don’t wake up once when a kid coughs or turns over loudly. I want eight hours where no one is up during the night going potty. I want eight hours of silence. I want eight hours where my brain is completely turned off. Sleep – deep, perfect sleep.
2. I would like a day where I sit alone on the couch all day in my comfy clothes watching endless crappy tv and surfing the internet. There are no children around anywhere and I feel no guilt.
3. I would like a day where I don’t have to feed the children anything. No constant requests for snacks, no planning what to serve for meals, no arguing about eating healthy foods, no debating over whether they can have dessert or not. Sorry kids, kitchen is closed.
4. This one might be a bit far-fetched but I would like one of those instant shower and dressing machines like on the Jetsons. Not having to bathe or dress the children – can you imagine? No arguing about who has to take a bath with who, no breaking up fights when one child inevitably dumps water on the other one’s head, no cleaning up gallons of water on the bathroom floor, no shampoo in the eyes, no wrestling squirming toddlers to get in to clothes, no mismatched socks. It.sounds.perfect.
5. I would like to fast forward the bedtime routine. The kids are great about going to bed but the process of getting them there seems to take forever. Between PJs, potty trips, a diaper change, three sets of teeth needing brushing, finding all favorite stuffed animals, arguing over who Tim and I are going to carry up the stairs and who has to walk, it just seems to draggggggggggggggggg. I want to be able to just hit the fast forward button on this and catch up on the time by pausing it when they are asleep. There is nothing more wonderful than watching a beautiful, sleeping child in their bed (especially when they were a complete monster during the day). 

Daniel and Henry scour the internet to find the perfect present. Little do they know Mommy just wants time away from them!

Rules to Follow Before Giving Hand-me-downs

I love hand-me-downs. I will happily accept used clothes, toys, baby gear, and anything else that you want to throw my way. Once I’m done using the items I will then pass them along to the next lucky recipient. When passing on used items there are some general rules that I follow that I would think would be pretty universally known. However, the more hand me down items I receive, the more I realize that people are not aware of the rules so I thought I would share here. Without further ado, I give you the top four rules to follow when giving someone hand-me-downs.

1. Size Matters – When you tell me you have a bag of 2T boys’ clothes that you are looking to get rid of. Do you know what I expect to be in the bag? 2T boys clothes – BINGO! I don’t expect a random assortment of clothes from newborn to size 4 for both boys and girls. At that point, I am not appreciative of your generosity with sharing your clothes. I’m cursing you for making me waste my time sorting through clothes that I don’t need/want. Have a random bag of clothes that you are looking to dump without sorting? Well then donate the entire bag to a local charity. I guarantee you that they will not be shouting expletives while going through the bag.
2. Stains, Holes, Rips Need Not Apply - I get it – stains happen. I know. I have three small kids. Although I have no problem seeing stains on other children, I generally try to limit the stains on my own children’s clothes. Holes are sewn and ripped clothes are turned into rags. Now do I think everyone needs to be anal like I am? No. Am I completely offended when you give me a bag of clothes and some clothes have a few stains on them? No. However, it’s the bags that 75%+ of the contents are VERY well worn then I’d just appreciate a heads up. I can then politely decline your clothes and you can pass them along to someone else. 
3. Your Trash is not my Treasure - Looking to get rid of some toys that your kids have outgrown? Fabulous, I’d love to take them. I’d just appreciate it if you could give me all the pieces to the toys and discard the broken ones. There’s nothing worse than the kids seeing a big box of toys only to discover that half the puzzles are incomplete, toys are broken with jagged pieces of plastic jetting out of them, and the Barbies have no heads. Have a box like this that you’re looking to get rid of? Please present it as, “I have a large box of trash that might contain two or three salvageable toys in it. Would you like to have it?” You can imagine what my answer will be.
4. A Little Soap Goes a Long Way - Kids are gross and toys get dirty. I know. Hand-me-down toys do not need to be spotless and I’m not expecting you to wash the toys before you give them to me. However, when you are giving me a box of INDOOR toys they should not be covered in grass and leaves. That right there is the dead giveaway that you have given me a box of junk from your garage. Oh, the dead spiders at the bottom of the box also seal the deal.

So all that being said, whose got some hand-me-downs for me?!

A Real Shoe-tastrophe

I used to love shoes, but now they are my nemesis. I feel like I spend half my day cleaning up and organizing them. When we walk in our house (through the kitchen), we immediately take our shoes off. This is currently what beside the door looks like:

Even the pretend broom is disgusted by the situation and trying to clean it up

I have no control over them. We have a shoe rack but they never stay in there. Between kids throwing them out when looking for another pair, Daniel playing with them, and the quantity just being ridiculous, I feel like there is no hope. The rule (which is clearly broken) is that each person can have no more than two pairs of shoes downstairs at once. Of course, it always happens that when there are sandals there that we need rain boots or when we have sneakers down, we need dress shoes. Then as I’m trying to run out the door with the kids, I’m back upstairs (with the kids following me) searching in the closest for the right shoes. Then when we get home those shoes never immediately end up back upstairs and shoeapalooza continues. Before we know it the entire kitchen is covered in shoes. It is a losing battle. 

Shoes- That's your home. Are you too good for your home?!

I’m thinking of getting a big basket/bucket/bin that I just throw all the kids’ shoes in. The problem is that I know that is only going to cause me other headaches. Henry will never be able to find a matching pair of shoes. Daniel will empty the basket and sit inside it. Isabelle will complain that her shoes aren’t neat enough or that the boys’ shoes got hers dirty. 

What is a girl to do?? I'm open to suggestions!