Wednesday, May 9, 2012

What I Really Want For Mother’s Day

  1. I would like eight hours of deep, continuous sleep. I want eight hours where I don’t wake up once when a kid coughs or turns over loudly. I want eight hours where no one is up during the night going potty. I want eight hours of silence. I want eight hours where my brain is completely turned off. Sleep – deep, perfect sleep.
  2. I would like a day where I sit alone on the couch all day in my comfy clothes watching endless crappy tv and surfing the internet. There are no children around anywhere and I feel no guilt.
  3. I would like a day where I don’t have to feed the children anything. No constant requests for snacks, no planning what to serve for meals, no arguing about eating healthy foods, no debating over whether they can have dessert or not. Sorry kids, kitchen is closed.
  4. This one might be a bit far-fetched but I would like one of those instant shower and dressing machines like on the Jetsons. Not having to bathe or dress the children – can you imagine? No arguing about who has to take a bath with who, no breaking up fights when one child inevitably dumps water on the other one’s head, no cleaning up gallons of water on the bathroom floor, no shampoo in the eyes, no wrestling squirming toddlers to get in to clothes, no mismatched socks. It.sounds.perfect.
  5. I would like to fast forward the bedtime routine. The kids are great about going to bed but the process of getting them there seems to take forever. Between PJs, potty trips, a diaper change, three sets of teeth needing brushing, finding all favorite stuffed animals, arguing over who Tim and I are going to carry up the stairs and who has to walk, it just seems to draggggggggggggggggg. I want to be able to just hit the fast forward button on this and catch up on the time by pausing it when they are asleep. There is nothing more wonderful than watching a beautiful, sleeping child in their bed (especially when they were a complete monster during the day). 
Daniel and Henry scour the internet to find the perfect present. Little do they know Mommy just wants time away from them!

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