Until now I've been the primary influence in her life. With the exception of half day preschool that she did three times a week last year, she spends 24/7 with me. She will now spend more time with her teachers than she does with me on a daily basis. I have absolutely no doubt that they can teach her way better than I ever could but still she's MY little girl. I know everything about her. I know how she's feeling. I know what she likes. I know what she needs. I am sure that they will figure it out and Isabelle will be totally fine in telling them but it still worries me. Isabelle is a planning, to-do list making, control freak and that is all to my credit (or fault?!). I (unintentionally) molded her that way. How will they mold her?
I know that at the end of the year she is going to be a totally different child. I know she will grow and learn and even that scares me. I'm not sure that I'm ready for that. I already see the changes happening and I want to freeze time. I want to keep her with me forever, just like this - young and innocent.
So tomorrow I will take her to kindergarten orientation with a smile on my face because I am happy. I'm happy that she loves to learn. I am happy that she is so excited to start this new chapter in her life. Inside, however, my heart will be breaking a little.