I’ve wrote before how deep down I would really love to have another baby. When people ask if we “are
done” I always say yes. Because we are done – or at least that’s what I’ve been
trying to convince myself of. In the back of my mind though, I secretly thought
that when Daniel turned two I could try to convince my husband to have another
baby. Please note, this would take A LOT of convincing. I figured by the time
he was two I would have had enough time to come up with a concrete plan (think
power point presentation complete with colorful graphs) that I could present to
the hubs about how it would be possible for us to have another child. The plan
would include either an addition to the house or a baby sleeping in a dresser
drawer – the details would need to be ironed out.
But now as we are fast approaching
Daniel’s second birthday (only a few weeks away) I don’t find myself feverishly
working on my presentation. Instead, I find myself relishing the sweet spot
that we are in. The spot where the kids are getting bigger (yes, they are still
just 4, 3, and 1!). The spot where we can (somewhat) easily get out of the house. The spot
where I can look into our future and think of fun family trips to take that
would be enjoyable as opposed to a nightmare. The spot where I can go to BBQs
and half-heartedly watch the kids in the yard while sipping on Sangria. The
spot where I’m not following crawling
babies around making sure they don’t eat too much grass. The spot where my
fingers are mine and not guides to help
new walkers explore the yard. There are no panic moments when I realize that I
haven’t seen the baby for a few minutes and he/she may be in the street, in a
trash barrel, or touching the grill. I’m really enjoying where we are right
now. I honestly can’t imagine getting pregnant and “starting over” again and I
never dreamed I would feel this way at this point. Maybe, just maybe, three
kids is enough and maybe I’m okay with that.
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Maybe all I need is a crime fighting alien, a princess, and a
diaper wearing tot trying to make a call on his fake phone
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I would have kept going until my uterus fell out. Stupid stupid dysfunctional uterus. You do make cute babies!
ReplyDeleteI am waiting on number #2 ... and hoping to add another red head, we will see! Your children are adorable.
ReplyDeleteLaurie
You have a beautiful family and it looks great the way it is to me. I'm also debating 3 vs 4 (I only have 2 now but I like to have a plan;) and I'm also leaning toward 3. I always thought I'd have 4 so it is strange to think about just 3 but I don't think I'm up to "starting over" two more times! It was comforting to find this blog post.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment. It's such a hard decision when you just don't know for sure. People say I could just give it time and decide later but I (like you!) am a planner and need to know NOW!
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